Golf Quotes

Eighteen holes of match play will teach you more about your foe than 18 years dealing with him across a desk.

Grantland Rice

Golf appeals to the idiot and us and the child. Just how childlike golf players become is proven by their frequent inability to count past five.

John Updike

It is almost impossible to remember how tragic a place the world is when one is playing golf.

Robert Lynd

If profanity had any influence on the flight of the ball, the game of golf would be played far better than it is.

Horace G. Hutchenson

They say golf is like life, but don’t believe them. Golf is more complicated than that.

Gardner Dickinson

If more people gripped a knife and fork as poorly as they do a golf club, they’d starve to death.

Sam Snead

Golf is a day spent in a round of strenuous idleness.

William Wordsworth

If you drink, don’t drive, don’t even putt.

Dean Martin

If you are going to throw a club, it is important to throw it ahead of you, down the fairway, so you don’t have to waste energy going back to pick it up.

Tommy Bolt

Man blames fate for all other accidents, but feels personally responsible when he makes a hole-in-one.

Bishop Sheen

I don't say my golf game is bad, but if I grew tomatoes they'd come up sliced.

Arnold Palmer

My handicap? Woods and irons.

Chris Codiroli

The ardent golfer would play Mount Everest if somebody would put a flag stick on top.

Pete Dye

I'm hitting the woods just great; but having a terrible time getting out of them!

Buddy Hackett

The only time my prayers are never answered is playing golf.

Billy Graham
It took me seventeen years to get 3,000 hits in baseball. I did it in one afternoon on the golf course.

Babe Ruth

Columbus went around the world in 1492. That isn't a lot of strokes when you consider the course

Lee Trevino

These greens are so fast I have to hold my putter over the ball and hit it with the shadow.

Sam Snead

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