When I decided to write this page, I doubted whether anyone needed another daily devotional to add to the thousands that are available and in use today. I heard that still small voice, and am directed to add to the devotional listings. Along with daily golf tips, we also need direction for our souls. To ponder and meditate on things spiritual, will heal us and point us in the direction of spirit.
The difference will be that this is not a “daily” writing, I have found through my years of working these steps that working on one thing for a week rather than something different everyday, helped me understand and internalize the message, and this in turn produced better results. We have enough clutter distracting us, and if I read something today and go my merry way, the prayer and the meditation is only good for a day. We must be fed for a life time, and that comes from practicing these principles, which lead us to live these principles.
We seek peace of mind in all our affairs not just on the golf course. I stated that the 12 Steps is the road map to a happier and more joyous way of life, golf is the vehicle. We are dealing with more than just golf, and I do not want to limit anyone who is not a golfer to be dissuaded from pursuing this 12 Step program, for it is a way of life for everyone. I am hoping that the non-golfer will also be inclined to pursue these steps and integrate them into their life and find the promises for themselves.
These prayers and meditations will be from my own journals or from someone‘s question during any given week. We have discussed the importance of journalizing and hopefully many of you are now writing.
I hope that my take on recovery and healing will help in the pursuit of any self help program one may find themselves. To see things differently and shed some light on what others may be saying.
"The idea of God is different in every person. The joy of recovery was to find God within me.....Angela L. Wozniak
Through meditation and prayer we try to improve our connection to our Higher Power. We have searched many years. We have been discontented with our relationship with God.
We carried the guilt and shame within ourselves. We never met those expectations we have set for ourselves. We walked away or ran away from relationships, jobs and uncomfortable situations.
Where were running to? We couldn’t trust ourselves, let alone those around us. We certainly couldn’t trust God.
God certainly couldn’t approve of us. We have fallen so far short of God’s expectations. Why would God want to have a relationship with us?
We have confused self punishment as God’s revenge. We have had a very misguided concept of God. Who is this God of our understanding? It is time for us to know this God and gain a relationship that is true and real.
Today I will find a path of communication with you. I want to know who you really are. I want to cast off the old ideas of my youth. I want to mature and grow a relationship with you. Help me to have understanding.
"However confused the scene of our life appears, however torn we may be who now face that scene, it can be faced, and we can go on to be whole".....Muriel Rukeyser
There are situations where we will feel fear or dread, these are temporary. These can make us feel it is more than we can bear.
Eventually, the sun shall shine. It is said “we are never given more than we can handle”.
As we grow and see our resiliency, we become more comfortable with ourselves. Our confidence grows as we learn “this too shall pass”, and our spiritual understanding gains ground.
When we realize, “I may not be the person I want to be, but I am grateful, I am not the person I used to be”, we will see the progress we have made.
There is no problem too great, that has to be faced alone, unless God and friends are rejected.
Help me grow toward wholeness and in gratitude. Help me see the problems in my life as opportunities, which bring me into agreement with the Divine plan for my life.
"I want to feel myself part of things, of the great drift and swirl; not shut off, missing things, like being sent to bed early as a child".....Joann Field
There are times we sit out because we are afraid of not being good enough. We struggle with our confidence.
We desire to connect with our fellow travelers on the road we have taken. We want to participate and feel a part of the action. We can be who we are without the self loathing and self contempt. We can look with empathy at our fellows, and to know they are on a journey toward becoming fully alive, also. We can extend a hand to let them know we understand.
We can move beyond the limits of ego. We can trust in knowing our lives are in God’s care. We can actually begin to let go of self-centered behaviors and emotions and become a part of the living.
As I travel through life today, help me to see my part in the activities of life. Help me to ease my struggle with the knowledge that I do belong.
"As in the physical world, so in the spiritual world, pain does not last forever"......Katherine Mansfield
As we struggle with our defects, our fears and our new way of life we do not grow without pain.
Letting go of our old ideals is never easy. Breaking down the walls of denial takes strength and effort.
This pain can hold us back and deter progress. The fear of the unknown causes this discomfort.
The Buddhist tells us "pain is inevitable, suffering is optional".
We can avoid the suffering by accepting pain as simple pain. To suffer is a judgment of our pain. If we believe that pain should not happen to us, we suffer. We feel sorry for ourselves to have to endure pain.
Remember, true masters experience peace in the face of disruption and conflict, not because they have found a way to avoid it, but as a way to grow.
Help me to find the peace I seek through the disruptions in my life. Give me the strength to become virtuous and have the integrity and dignity as I temporarily deal with my pain.
This is a personal request:
I have a friend who is in serious condition in a hospital in Stewart, Fl. Dodie and I went to high school together. They found a cancerous tumor on her brain. She is currently undergoing treatment.
I would like to devote this week to her. Please pray for her recovery.
Thank you very much.
"everything has its wonders, even darkness and silence, and I learn, whatever state I may be in, therein to be content"......Helen Keller
Joy comes as we recognize and celebrate the wonder of the moment.
To become wholly in touch with the now and how we can achieve spiritual connectedness to the life we have been given, is the serenity we seek.
We can find contentment in whatever we are experiencing.
We are moving forward and we participate in the wonderment of our lives dramas and comedies. Life is filled with mystery and amusement.
I ask for courage and strength to see the wonderment even in the darkness. To know that the silence I experience is not the proof of you not hearing me. There is a reason for every season.
“When our myths, dreams and ideals are shattered, our world topples“………..Kathleen Casey Theison
We dream and hope to attain our ideals. Some of those ideals are set in the myths we have told ourselves, sometimes they are just wishes. What are the ideals that we value to motivate our actions?
I recall how my world was shattered when I came to the realization that I wasn’t the person I thought I was. Hitting a bottom will change one’s life. We are given the opportunity to start over. We can resist change or we can learn and grow.
Our lives can be toppled from the loss of a job to the loss of a parent. Our relationships change or end, but we must go on.
Reworking a life is never easy. We have held on to some myths longer than we should have. We may have dreams that must be changed. What are the values that give me my ideals?
We will either grow or our souls will die. We have the opportunity to become the person we want to be or become an empty shell bitter and resentful. When we break through and find the true story of who we are, we are free from those ties that bind us to the old myths. We can write new chapters in our books of life.
Help me to use the changes in my life wisely. Help me to be more productive in becoming the person I want to become. Let me leave those old beliefs in the past and move forward to a new life.
….”as awareness increases, the need for personal secrecy almost proportionately decreases”….Charlotte Painter
Everyone carries a measure of shame around with them. Fear of others knowing those little secrets we hide is a tremendous amount of work. The more we hide and think we cannot share the more exhausted we become.
We all want to be accepted, and fear rejection. Even our thoughts are censured. We shouldn’t think this nor that or the other thing. We suppress so many things today, and shame ourselves for entertaining a thought that may be different from those around us.
We deny our feeling. Layer upon layer of unrecognized emotions. We carry them around with us and make us weary.
We live in a prison of our own making. We have put one iron bar up at a time from the lies we tell ourselves. Must I be perfect? Is perfection achievable?
The more committed we become to this simple program the greater is our knowledge of the deceptions we tell ourselves.
Help me to remember that I am only as sick as the secrets I keep. I want to be free of the power these secrets have over my life. Give me the strength to become honest with myself.
“Love is an expression and assertion of self-esteem, a response to one’s own values in the person of another”………Ayn Rand
We are to do unto others as we would have them do unto us. How often do we treat others with the respect and understanding that we so do want to have others do unto us?
When we have discovered the truth of our inner self do we try to run away? Do we take what we know and learn to accept ourselves? Do we transfer unto those around us the inadequacies we have about ourselves or hate others because they seem more together than we?
If I can accept who I truly am and I have the desire to change the errors in my perceptions I can develop self respect. As I gain self respect, I can begin to incorporate better values.
Self respect is a struggle and we will stumble. There is the fine line between genuine self worthiness and that of false pride. This all takes practice, we need to see what we are doing to grow, not what we haven’t done. We need to nurture ourselves which will develop the values that will carry us to new situations and new opportunities for achievement.
I become vulnerable and compassionate towards others as I grow and accept myself and develop values. It is the healing of the wounds that allows me to be able to treat others with respect. I can begin to empathize with others and not pity myself. I will be strong on this quest for self respect.
Devotional weeks 1-8